Pirate's Booty
by teardrop-gem
Summary: Pirate/Siren AU with Jasper/Lapis. Lasper. Lapis is a siren and Jasper is a pirate. She was a predator, she was prey. Can I make it any more obvious? (No but this is going to be gay as hell.) M for violence and possible sinning in future chapters.
1. Chapter 1

Life under the sea isn't as bad as it may seem to most. The crashing waves, the fish, the constant taste of salt… None of it bothers one as much as the thick silence that fills the ears. Admittedly, Lapis Lazuli is a lonely siren. There are others, sure, but she'd grown up around them. They'd seen her through the awkward stages, through the dulling scales and the gangly limbs. Now, however, she's blossomed into a beautiful thing. Cerulean tail that shines like stars and hair the same color and lustre – it's hard to believe she hasn't been picked up by a wealthy socialite as a wife.

It isn't as if she's against the thought of a romantic partner, though it isn't unheard of in the community, no – she just isn't interested in what she's seen around her. It's all the same. Cold, scaly. Unfeeling.

The only really exciting days are the ones where a shadow blots out the sun, and everything is dark. The shadow could be anything – a whale passing, a clump of seaweed, or a ship. Ships are ideal, because there's not only the entertainment of crashing it, but meals are an added plus. Whales are fun to ghost, see how far they go until their migration is complete. Sometimes, she ends up in an entirely different part of the world.

Today is one of those exciting days, it seems, and Lapis surfaces to see the cause of the sudden shade. A ship! It's her lucky day, too, because she's mostly alone in this port. She beats her tail over to the rocky cliffside and hauls herself up onto a flat boulder – the perfect seat. It seems as if it were made for a siren to sit on, because it was. Centuries of luring sailors to their deaths has ground this sorry piece of sediment down.

The wooden vessel approaches at a snail's pace, bobbing in the waves. Upon closer inspection, the entire crew seems to be up on the poopdeck, milling around and doing whatever it is humans on boats do. The ship itself is grandly carved, with off-white sails billowing and proudly bowed hull. On the bow is a figurehead – a woman with soft features and long curled hair seems to look out, protecting the crew from harm. She's seen this one before – it's a common carving, apparently. Commonly known as Rose. She'd learnt the name from a sailor on one of her ships. His dying words were, "Rose, save us."

And then she'd ripped his throat out.


	2. Chapter 2

The ship is so close now that Lapis can smell the bilge water. Just a few more yards until she's within earshot, and she can begin her song.

Contrary to popular belief, siren songs are not always the end-all be-all of sailor hunting. It depends on the type of ship paired with the right song. These sailors are a rowdy bunch, she can already tell. It's obvious from the sheer amount of alcohol in the bilge. She'll do best with a jovial hornpipe, she decides, and, as soon as she can hear their conversations (however faintly), she starts the tune. Their human ears won't be able to discern words, but they will hopefully be so entranced with her voice that they crash their ship right into the cliff face. Stupid creatures. She would laugh, but it would ruin her song.

Her melody lilts, and the direction of the Man of War heaves towards the wall of rock. Between notes, she runs her tongue over her needle-like teeth. She's a predator, suited well for ripping flesh from bone. It won't be long until she'll be able to fill her hungry belly, just a few more yards…

Yelling upon the ship. That shouldn't be happening – her song should be lulling all the men upon the ship into a stupor. They shouldn't be fighting it. But no, this is just one voice. One gravelly, deep, irate voice. It's hard to make out what it's saying, at first, but as the ship draws nearer, the screaming becomes clearer.  
"Idiots! Are you all three sheets to the wind?! You'll feed the fish if we continue this direction! Heave to, helmsman! Listen to your captain!" And yet nobody answers the voice.

While singing, Lapis sits up as straight as she possibly can to see the origin of the voice. And there, it snaps into place in her mind. Of course this _woman_ isn't affected by her song. A female pirate! That's a new one for the books. She's pretty, too. Or, the opposite of pretty. Burly and strapping fits better.

The woman pirate stands at at least six foot six, with broad shoulders and thighs as thick as tree trunks. Lapis could swoon, if she weren't so caught up in her song. Still, her eyes lock on this woman, and she examines her very carefully. She's never had womanflesh before. At this point, the ship is too close to the cliff to veer away at the last moment. It's already sinking, the sharp rocks hidden by the water proving to be too much for the wooden toy boat.

"Oy," Lapis calls after a few moments of watching this woman scramble around deck and nearly beat the life out of her crew-mates. "Why are you a pirate if you're a woman? Shouldn't you be at home, popping children out?"

* * *

Why couldn't they see that they were headed right towards a cliff? What could possibly disturb her crew so much that their souls left their bodies entirely?  
"Helmsman, return to course as planned." No response. No 'Aye.' How irritating. At this rate, they'd be shark-bait. If she believed the legends of mermaids luring sailors to their deaths, she'd attribute their absolute dullness to that.

"Helmsman. You listening? Turn us back around. Now." Still, no reply. Jasper turns to look at the man, and he's not his usual self. His eyes are glassy, jaw hanging wide open. He'd probably had too much of the Kill Devil. Ugh. "Snap out of it. What, are you addled?"

When only silence and the clap of waves meets her ears, she grows worried. Worry turns to anxiety turns to irritation turns to anger, and she grunts and slams her fist into the mast of the ship.

"Idiots! Are you all three sheets to the wind?! You'll feed the fish if we continue this direction! Heave to, helmsman! Listen to your captain!" Nothing. Her entire crew is up on deck now, just standing there like a pack of addlepates. She'll need to snap them back to reality the only way she knows how – with violence.

And so Jasper proceeds to beat the cotton out of her mens' ears. They all stand at attention still, bloodied and bruised.

"You dogs," She whispers, "We're boardside with Death, here…" And then a woman calls to her from somewhere out of sight.

"Oy," It calls, "Why are you a pirate if you're a woman? Shouldn't you be at home, popping children out?" How utterly infuriating.

"This is my home, wench. Where are you?"

"Down here, on the rock," The woman singsongs, like the coo of a dove. "Will you come look to me?"

And so Jasper does. She must! What kind of woman would be down on the rocks, after all? She has to see this.

Upon peering over the ledge of the ship, Jasper's breath leaves her body. A beauty, to be sure, but with the lower half of a fish! She's unlike any other Jasper has ever seen.  
"What do you call yourself, wretch?" She calls down, eyes narrowed suspiciously. Perhaps she should have been more trusting in the sea maiden stories…

"Lapis Lazuli. I'm a siren." Her voice is soft and breathy, as if it's unused. Maybe she's used to speaking underwater more. "Who are you?"

"Jasper. That's it, just the one name. Are you the reason my men have gone mad?" Soon, she'll have to jump onto one of the rocks. The deck is very close to the level of the water. Now seems as good a time as any, so Jasper clambers up the ledge and hops off. It's about a three-foot drop, but the impact onto the boulder stings her ankles. She's within arm's reach of the mermaid.

Now that she's closer, she notices how her skin is nearly translucent, and glistens eerily in the sunlight. Her eyes and hair and tail all match in color, and it's the purest blue she's ever seen. She likens it in her mind to the way the sky looks from underwater, marbled by reflecting light. She also notices now the points of her teeth, the hunger in her eyes.

It's unsettling, to say the least.


	3. Chapter 3

**it's like 4am and i jst finished writing this so i apologize in advance for any errors/overall shittiness in this chapter**

* * *

Up close, this human woman – Jasper, she recalls – is very, very attractive. In an odd sort of way, of course. She's large, burly, and muscled much like the other pirates Lapis dines on, but there's no desire to feed here. There are… Other desires.

Lapis notes that the reason she's feeling these unwelcomed impulses is probably compulsory infatuation upon discovering something new. Jasper is warm looking, with skin the color of red seaweed (the most delectable kind.) There are bands of a pale white, however, the largest being on her face, and others gracing her uncovered arms. Her hair is like spun gold, and it's so thick Lapis is sure that she could hide in it if need be. Jasper's eyes are an unnamable color – somewhere between yellow and orange – and it's something she's never seen before. Jasper is something she's never seen before.

To clarify, all of the sirens she's met have been cool-toned, with pale skin and dull eyes do to the lightless environment they often reside in. It gets boring after a lifetime, truly.

"Jasper, you said? And why are you a pirate when you could stay at home and be a wife?" Lapis believes she knows the answer to that question, for she feels the same thirst for adventure. The sea is her home, of course, but there's always been whisperings in her head of wanting to see more. More than the stark blue, which to her has grown so unforgiving that it hurts.

"Why stay at home and be a wife when I could see the world? What's it to you, anyways?" Her tone is harsh, sneering, and Lapis eats it right up.

"You've not yet seen the world. Land is the smallest part, you know. Will you take my hand? I want to feel human skin."  
But Jasper is smarter than that, apparently. She takes a step back and places her hand on the cutlass at her waist. "I'm no idiot, pretty. I won't be your prey. Why don't you eat my men? They're drowning already." It isn't an offer so much as it is a genuine curiosity.

"I'm not hungry anymore," Lapis admits, "I smelt too much of your bilge water, and I've lost my appetite – not that I would have eaten you anyway. Now you're closer, I don't want to." There's also the fact that other hungry sirens are coming up to snap up anything that moves. Lapis would rather stay on the rock until the frenzy ends. Behind Jasper's back, torsos and limbs bob around in the water – disappearing quickly.

Jasper's face shows how taken aback she is. "Now, just what sort of fool you take me for? First you're a siren – I've got to believe that, I've seen it here with my own eyes – and then you're full suddenly? After putting in all this work to find a meal?"

"You're too pretty to eat," Lapis flatters. Yes, she can be quite the flirt when conversing with the object of her affections. That is, this is the first time anything of this nature has happened, so it is safe to assume so. "And as I said, the water your ship spewed has made me nearly ill. You should be apologizing rather than accusing. How much rum do you all need to drink?"

* * *

Jasper will be the first to admit her distaste for men. They're too prideful for her liking, too much like her. Still, she'd rather be stuck on the open sea with them than on land with a bunch of lubbers. She is, in fact, what one would call an old salt – however young, she's spent much of her life onboard some ship or another, and has risen the ranks until she'd finally become captain of her own: a pretty little caravel called The Hammerhead.

As for the figurehead, she had never really believed in the stories of the virgin mother Rose Quartz, but none of her men would step aboard her ship without her 'protection.' So, begrudgingly, she had commissioned a carver to create a beautiful sculpture. She was proud of her vessel, the fine lady, and seeing her sink like this is bittersweet. She's got enough gold to buy a larger, more ornate one, and pay off a better crew now. Her men had never been loyal. Frankly, seeing them sink is more sweet than bitter.

"I don't drink," She rumbles, raising an eyebrow. "These dogs do." With a backwards glance at the red-inked water, she adds, "Did."

Lapis seems to find this amusing, because she's laughing then, and it's like a chorus of bells in Jasper's ears. If this is anything like what her crew had heard, she can understand why they had been enraptured by her. She's enchanting.

"Jasper, was it? How will you get to port now? There's no way you could make it with those silly land fins you have. I could help you, if you'd let me."  
"Jasper it was. What reason do you have for helping me, if not to fell my next crew once I leave here once more? What reason do I have for trusting you? You're a pretty thing, but a shady one as well." Jasper scoffs, her upper lip quirking up to bare her teeth in a disgusted expression.

"You wound me," Lapis quips, "But at least you'd be alive still. Come, take my hand. Please, I want to feel human skin. Is womanskin better than manskin? I imagine it's softer, but maybe not on you. You seem rough." Jasper notes that Lapis is an inquisitive creature, and seems to be fascinated by her.

"Is siren skin slimy? Do you all feel like sand paper?" She retorts, jaw ticking. Her patience is wearing thin. She extends her hand warily, large palm facing upwards. "I'll take your help this time, but don't expect anything in return."

Lapis excitedly places her slender hand in Jasper's, and it's dwarfed. She sure is a dainty thing, Jasper thinks. Her eyes travel down to the azure tail. It's elegant, like a show animal, but has what look like bioluminescent stripes running down the sides. She can't liken it to any fish she's caught yet.

If she weren't scared shitless by the possibility of death by mermaid, she would be swooning.


End file.
